Historic Agreement / Sul7a Signed

Loyal readers, I am pleased to inform you that KABOBfestWATCH and KABOBfest have formally agreed upon a "Sul7a" or peace agreement. Understandably, many of you may be shocked by this -- as KFW's sworn goal was the complete destruction of KABOBfest. Allow me to explain...

After being viciously attacked by a KABOBfest affiliate last month, I was surprised to receive a "get well" card and bouquet of lilies from uncircumcised KABOBfest founder Will -- signed by every member of KABOBfest (except NarcelX of course, because he's a big fat baby). The card read "Sorry" and had Pooh Bear on the front.

Long story short, I talked to my psychologist about the KFW episode and had a change of heart. Don't be surprised, I am human after all. I realize now that all I ever really wanted was to be appreciated by KABOBfest.

Thank you for all of your support, and please continue to read my posts on KABOBfest.

The terms of our Sul7a are below:

KABOBfest announces a historic peace deal with KABOBfestWATCH, ending the ancient conflict that began in March, 2008.

Programmer Buydatti (PB) will become one with KABOBfest (KF) again on the following agreed upon conditions:

1. PB will re-gain his autonomy as a sovereign, contiguous blogger on KABOBfest so long as he does not violate KF etiquette (yes it does exist), nor threaten the security of KF.

2. KABOBfestWATCH will remain, and be linked to KF, as a testament to the historic tragedy of PB's "forced-exile/ fleeing" from KABOBfest.

3. PB will not be compensated for loss of public stature for his public "terrorizing of/resisting against" KF. Nor wil he have the "right" to return any of his old posts we removed due to their vulgarity.

4. PB will retain his right to mock, humiliate, and hit on KF members at will, even if to the breaking point, thus causing KF members to quit in protest.

5. PB will have shared control of parts of the holy (web)sites in KF, but the final say will belong to KF's master-administrato rs.

6. No one shall mention PB's public crying episode when he "was-forcefully- exiled/fled" from KF. Ever.

7. PB shall retain some access rights to his apartment buildings water. rooftop, hallways, and doors, but KF will possess final authority over such areas.

8. PB will be allowed to hit on any commenters and KABOB3rses he chooses.

Sincerely,

PB

DID HELL JUST FREEZE OVER?

I actually agree with a KABOBfest! Diana's most recent post, "On Politics & Prose," is FANTASTIC! Oh... wait... something just dripped on my head. Oh damn, it's water. Must be the ice melting... CAUSE KABOBfest DIDN'T WRITE IT!

Anyway, the post -- which is actually an op-ed by UCLA professor Saree Makdisi -- discusses how destructive the stifling of conversation surrounding the Israeli-Palestinian conflict can be.

Apparently KABOBfest now believes in freedom of speech and honoring all points of view.

But wait. Wasn't Will's alleged reason for booting me from KABOBfest because he thought I crossed the line with one of my posts? HYPOCRITES!!

KFW BLOGGER WANTED

It appears that the school semester has ended because KABOBfest has been posting nonstop for the past couple of days. As such, I'm finding it terribly difficult to balance work & life with pointing out all the inaccuracies and falsehoods in their posts. Therefore, I'd like to recruit another KFW blogger to lessen the burden on me.

Qualifications: knowledge of Arab-related issues, superb writing & copy editing skills, and unwavering dedication to the truth. Photoshop skills a plus.

If any of this blog's loyal readers are interested in joining my revolution against the KABOBfest propaganda machine, please send a letter of interest to Buydatti@Gmail.com.

DOWN WITH KABOBfest!

Where Did Programmer Buydatti Go?

It's been exactly one week since my last post. Since then I've come down with a horrible stomach ailment. My pediatrician is convinced that it's food poisoning. No doubt the folks over at KABOBfest had something to do with it...

Sit tight folks. I'll get those bastards back soon enough. Vengeance will be mine!

In the meantime, does anyone else agree with me that new KABOBfest commenter Ally is a total babe?

NSFW: KABOBfest Censors Emily, Proves Will Lies

KABOBfest brags that it's "an unedited forum for Arab-Americans and friends," but censors Emily's most recent post: "Why Inviting Someone to a Conference is An Assy Thing to Do... In Palestine"

While her post currently features the following feel-good photo, that wasn't always the case...

The original (and highly disgusting) original photo is below. As one commenter noted, "This is probably the lowest kabobfest has stooped for a post."

And KABOBfest supposedly banned me for being too graphic in my posts? I would have never posted anything this disgraceful! If Emily isn't immediately removed from KABOBfest, then you'll know Will's story for firing me was BULLSHIT! The truth is finally revealed... Will lied and KABOBfest censors!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UPDATE: Will changed the picture once more. I think he's trying to alter history in an attempt to make me seem like a liar. I won't let that happen. Continue reading KFW for more on Will's immature, mindless head games. Here's the new picture:

DOWN WITH KABOBFEST!!

Proof KFW is Killing KABOBfest (for good)

I'm happy to announce that KABOBfestWATCH has won second place in KABOBfest's recent poll: "Why We Suck This Month." The poll shows that 27% of KABOBfest's readership credit KABOBfestWATCH for KABOBfest's recent lull in activity. This is wonderful news, as KFW's ultimate goal is to virtually murder KABOBfest! Soon enough there will be no KABOBfest to have these stupid polls. MU-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!

Most Pathetic Blog of the Year?

Boo-hoo! At least this isn’t the “most pathetic blog” of the century -- KABOBfest! And at least I’m not the “most pathetic” blogger of eternity -- Will!

In a statement released yesterday, I exposed the real reasons for which the folks at KABOBfest barred me from continuing to contribute to their blog. Basically, Will invited me on board for the sole purpose of embarrassing me in front of a female contributor who we’re both interested in (but she’s only interested in me). After berating me with ad hominem attacks on the KABOBfest listserv, he took the feud public – which caused a lot of heartache for everyone involved.

Will verified my statement by publishing more ad hominem attacks this morning, calling me “disgraced… a laughable mockery… juvenile… wackjob… collaborator,” and “KABOB3rs.”

It’s clear that the person at fault here is William, and others agree. Why else would he be leading the poll for suckiest KABOBer? DOWN WITH THE FEST!!

Welcome to KABOBfest Watch

After a brief seven-post stint on KABOBfest, I was abruptly and unjustly removed from the blog by Will, the site’s uncircumcised Canadian pseudo-Arab ringleader. While he claims that my dismissal was the result of “creative differences about the future of KABOBfest,” it was actually the result of his childish jealousy over a woman -- who, interestingly, also writes for KABOBfest. In an attempt to humiliate me and subsequently win her attention, Will invited me to write for KABOBfest only to berate me with ad hominem attacks over the site’s listserv. After realizing what his true intentions were for inviting me to blog for the site, I exposed his juvenile plan to the woman in question and firmly demanded that he apologize. Instead, he responded by removing me from KABOBfest and allowing our private feud to spill out onto the site –- humiliating me in front of both family and friends.

I now write for KABOBfest Watch, a blog dedicated to exposing the misinformation that Will and his rabid gang of self described “activists” spread about America, Israel, and the Arab World. Now we’ll see who’s humiliated...