Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Breaking News: Programmer Craig Sexually Outed!

On Monday, I defined the term "KABOBfest" for the public to read, learn, and understand. The very next day, a stupid idiot named Diana Mugg re-defined the term. This morning it was re-re-defined, not once, but twice:

The first new definition, submitted by Mohammad Will, is inadequate because it implies that camel meat is the only type of meat that the KABOBfesters include in their meat-on-a-stick cuisine. In reality, goats and chickens are more commonly consumed. To make matters worse, Mohammad Will failed to construct a grammatically correct definition. See, a person can't eat meat at one sitting, but during one sitting... blockhead!

While the second new definition gives the goons at KABOBfest far too much intellectual credit, I appreciate the fact that Um Craig, Arabic for "Craig's mother," took the time to formulate an Urban Dictionary definition for the term. I had no idea that KABOBfest was a family affair for Programmer Craig - who, by the way, is a consistent and racist pain-in-the-ashkelon commentator on KABOBfest.

Unfortunately for Craig, his mother let it slip in her example sentence that he was the one who created the first hoax definition -- which stated that KABOBfest is an "O.B.L. fanclub." That definition, however, was submitted by someone named Diana Mugg. Given these facts, one can only logically deduce that Programmer Craig is actually a woman (named Diana Mugg) trapped in a "sad and lonely" male programmer's body... not that there's anything wrong with that, I just thought I'd let you know.

KABOBfestWatch: At the forefront of investigative blogging.

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