Thursday, March 13, 2008

Boater Translation: "How Do You Say Marketplace In Arabic?"

Below is a translation of Fayyad's latest post: "How Do You Say Marketplace In Arabic?" Please note that it constitutes no direct or indirect endorsement of Fayyad's lame jokes:

The staff of NPR/PRI’s financial program packed their bags and traveled to the Middle East in order to report from one of the world’s fastest growing economies -- for a few days at least. Believe it or not, there is enough of a story there to fill a couple of weeks worth of programming. After all, there’s more to the Middle East than just oil.

[Editor’s Note: Lacking an interesting transitional sentence, Fayyad now takes a lame and unrelated (yet typical) dig at Zionists in order to inform KABOBfest’s readership that influential American institutions are interested in perusing closer ties with the Arab world.]

If reading the previous paragraph gave you a knot in the stomach, or even slightly bothered you, then you’re probably a Zionist, or some other form of racist who should seriously consider seeing a medical professional. If that’s the case, I suggest you avoid the Cleveland Clinic, as it underwrote NPR/PRI’s entire Mid-East adventure. Avoiding Harvard's Medical School would also be wise, as today’s report said it’s planning to open a branch in Dubai.

[Editor’s Note: Back to the subject at hand…]

While much of NPR/PRI’s Mid-East reporting has been rooted in Cairo and Dubai, the failing Palestinian economy has also garnered much attention. Divided into a three-part series, the Marketplace team reports on the difficulty of doing business under occupation, “Olive Oil Diplomacy” (featuring the Palestinian Fair Trade Association’s co-op of olive farmers), and... [Editor’s Note: Fayyad fails to mention the third Palestine-related topic covered].

Another interesting report tackled the subject of Islam and sustainability. Is Islam a green concept? [Editor’s Note: Brace yourselves for a real knee-slapper.] I don’t think that’s why Hamas’ flag is colored as such. [Editor's Note: Sorry folks, that's about as funny as he gets.]

Best of all, the reports weren’t so simplistic that they couldn’t appeal to someone as informed about the region as I am. [Editor's Note: Someone thinks awfully high of himself.] The show’s website even donned a banner with its name in Arabic.

For the record, "Marketplace" is "Souk" in Arabic.

6 comments:

Fayyad said...

wha wha wha, he forgot to mention what the third topic is...

I said the second aired "today" meaning the third is yet to come. I'm not a psychic, or is it Saicic?

Sooraya said...

If it weren't for these boater translation, I'd just skip over Fayyad's columns. Now that I know what he's saying, he's actually pretty interesting.

Programmer Buydatti said...

That's right Fayyad. Keep crying. I'm bringing the pain.

I'm not volunteering... said...

buydatti, when are you gonna give it up? all this because you lost out on some kabobfest punany??? could kabobers please do an online fundraiser to buy an hour of spitzer's prostitute's time for lonesome little buydatti?

Programmer Buydatti said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Programmer Buydatti said...

It's not about the poon wise ass, it's about R.E.S.P.E.C.T.